Marriage

The Three Biggest Mistakes Men Make When Approaching Women

If Cyrano de Bergerac pulled it off, then so can you? After you eventually start a relationship with her and she comes to understand the reality of your situation, she’ll also understand why you lied. She’ll see your true colors. She’ll forgive and forget. She will be that head over heels in love with you, that it won’t matter. This, of course, never happens in real life. From lying about your education and background to saying you enjoyed one of her favorite books (which, of course, you had never heard about until ten seconds ago), fibs are wrong. First of all, because they usually go south faster than you imagined. Slip-ups happen to everyone and the best way to avoid them is to stay completely level and honest. Secondly, aside from a quick night of hot sex, lying is not likely to get you anywhere. And if you do figure out you would like more from her than just that one-off night, building something genuine with her on a foundation of lies will become infinitely more complicated than if you had been honest.
Biggest Mistakes Men Make When Approaching Women


Acting Superior

There’s a school of thought in advice on how to get a girl to like you which says that women need men to put them in their place, in spite of feminism and other such bogus concepts. The truth is that women are independent and have a mind of their own for the most part. They don’t enjoy being put down or gratuitously criticized any more than men do. No, they will not appreciate you looking down on them for wearing too much make up or for not being able to recite the titles in Hemingway’s complete works. Similarly, they will not look up to you or want you to teach them of your wise ways – and those who do will only make you end up regretting ever having gotten involved with them.
Playing Hard to Get

You’ve read the dating tips, columns, and books. You’ve seen the movies, from romantic comedies following the lovely shenanigans of Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, to dramatic epics. It’s all over the place, really: acting hard to get, aloof, mysterious, and emotionally distant will get you all the women you want. False. This fallacy is based on the assumption that women swoon over mysterious, tall, dark, and handsome types. By not allowing a woman to see behind your motives, you will create a sense of desire in her. Equally false. The complete opposite, i.e. ‘wearing your heart on your sleeve’ or over-sharing from the get-go is not the right way to go about it, either. The truth of the matter is that women want to enjoy being pursued by you and so do you. Building that type of pleasurable pursuit is based on actual tension and attraction, not on holding some at arm’s length while pursuing a hidden agenda. Unless, of course, you want to land a woman who enjoys this sort of mind game that plays on her insecurities. In that case, yes, definitely go for it – you just might not enjoy the aftermath.

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